


Wibbly Wobblivious

by Draxynnic



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Breaking Relationships For The Sake Of Saving The World, Chat Blanc references, Crack, Major Character Death Mentioned, Not so oblivious, Or At Least Paris, People keep figuring out identities, Time Travel, Who ordered this angst in my crack?, and Bunnyx keeps going back to stop it, but it doesn't stick, inspired by a tumblr post
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-01-30 00:17:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21419068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Draxynnic/pseuds/Draxynnic
Summary: “Relaaaax!” Alix reassured Marinette. “If he hasn’t figured out your crush on him by now, he’s not going to. He’s so oblivious you could probably walk up and snog him right on the lips and he wouldn’t figure it out as long as you claimed it was an accident!”Oh, if only her younger self could have known…
Comments: 33
Kudos: 159





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to [MiniMinou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniMinou/pseuds/MiniMinou) for the [initial idea](https://mini-minou.tumblr.com/post/188925592203/in-light-of-the-recent-episode-a-concept-is-born), and to [Gui_fan_pt](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gui_fan_pt/pseuds/Gui_fan_pt) for the beta read.

“So, what have you got for me, M...sorry, Pegasus?”  
  


Pegasus had set up a screen in Bunnyx’s… well, the first time someone had made the ‘bigger on the inside’ observation, there had been no avoiding calling it a TARDIS, however much Fluff had objected to the label. In response to the question, Pegasus gave a signal to Markov - now upgraded with much more capable hardware - who projected a chart on a screen, showing a number of different-coloured spots over a two-year period.  
  


“Here’s a chart of all the interventions that we’ve needed to make in the timestream as part of what we’ve been calling Operation: Oblivious… also known as Operation: If Only These People Were As Unobservant As We Thought They Were. The marks in blue” Pegasus gestured to a series of such marks “...are the accidental reveals - things like them both choosing the same place to transform or detransform and so on. Those aren’t really important for what we’re looking at, since they’re individually fairly simple to prevent.”  
  


Bunnyx pulled up a chair and settled down, arms crossed. “Just go back, arrange for whatever coincidence it was to _ not happen _, and done.”  
  


“Exactly. So we can ignore those data points.” Pegasus motioned towards his robotic assistant, and the blue spots disappeared “Of greater concern is when somebody figures out something they shouldn’t by piecing together the clues and coincidences themselves. We’ve been actively looking to prevent that by giving them reasons not to suspect one another. This operation…” Pegasus taps on a mark early in the chart “...was particularly inspired, and probably delayed the need for a dozen other operations to prevent Marinette from being discovered.” Pegasus turned away from the chart to meet Bunnyx’s gaze with an inquisitive look. “How did you manage to get her and Ladybug in one spot?”  
  


In response, Bunnyx gestured to the Miraculous on her wrist “I _ originally _ had the watch being passed down on the eighteenth birthday. No sense giving something that valuable and easily broken to a kid who’s still in school, after all, particularly with people like Chloe and Lila around. So I wound that forward a couple of years and BAM!” Bunnyx punctuates her exclamation by tapping two fingers on the back of her other hand. “Time traveling akuma mini-me!”  
  


“Really took one for the team there.” Pegasus observed.  
  


“Tell me about it” Bunnyx groaned in return. “The hard part was making sure that Minibug didn’t beat mini-me on the first pass through. I had to rearrange her schedule so she was too frazzled to figure it out the first time through… getting the bet on the same day as my birthday wasn’t too hard, but making it so that that was also the same day as her parent’s anniversary _ and _ for Nadja to have a special occasion that called for cake at the same time...” Bunnyx trailed off, her grimace speaking the words that she left unspoken.   
  


“Can’t argue with results, though.” Pegasus turned back to the chart, pointing out a series of green spots. “Without that, Adrien would have figured it here, here, or here, or even here - there were just too many akumas that lead to a ‘sealed room’ scenario, not to mention the tweaks it would have otherwise taken to get Chat to buy that ‘secret mission’ thing. Didn’t stop Alya, though.” Pegasus taps on a red spot earlier in the chart. “Here we have what we’re calling The Textbook Incident…”  
  


“Oh, yeah. Figuring that one had me stumped, until I saw that depiction of the Egyptian Ladybug on one of the artifacts that had been displayed at the Louvre two years before.” Bunnyx gave an expressive shrug. “I managed to arrange some political instability in Egypt just before the dig happened, delaying it by a couple of years. That meant that the Louvre’s turn to display the artifacts came that much later, _ just _ in time to give Alya the idea that Ladybug was thousands of years old rather than fourteen…”  
  


“Thirteen.” Pegasus interjected.  
  


“Huh?” Bunnyx responded indignantly.  
  


“Marinette hadn’t had her fourteenth birthday until _ here _.” Pegasus indicates a later portion of the chart.  
  


“Whatever. Most of us were already fourteen by then… or older. I also knew, given how he’d reacted the year before, that the delay would get my brother akumatised as well, which fortunately gave Minibug the opportunity to recover her textbook.” Bunnyx shrugs. “I _ also _ managed to arrange for Alya to come up with the idea that Chloe was Ladybug. That got her to back off from investigating the class for a while.” With a brief pause, Bunnyx locks eyes with Pegasus. “ _ Never _ let Rena find out that’s what I needed to borrow Trixx for.”  
  


“Noted.” Pegasus acknowledges, before pointing to a yellow spot. “And here we have the Diary Incident...”  
  


“Couldn’t stop her from _ keeping _ the diary as much as I tried,” Bunnyx admits, “but I did manage to get her to come up with the idea of protecting it _ before _ Sabrina got her hands on it.”  
  


“And here we have the ‘Ice Cream Incident’...” Pegasus points at another green spot.  
  


“After he gave them _ that _ cone, there was no way he couldn’t figure it out. They were happy for a bit, and then Hawkdaddy was a raging dumpster fire who forced them to break up just so he could akumatise Marinette and…” Bunnyx rolls her eyes “...well, then it was all over. I arranged for there to be a spree of petty crime just beforehand so Gabriel wouldn’t let him out. He got out anyway, of course, but instead of rendezvousing with his civilian friends, he tried that _ ridiculous _ candle spread on Ladybug.”  
  


Pegasus nods. “Which did lead to Adrien finding out that Ladybug was in love with _ someone _, which was… not ideal.”  
  


Bunnyx shrugs. “Best outcome I could get. Even if I also had to cut off Andre’s supply of red-with-black-spots ice cream before he could offer some when Adrien, Marinette , and Kagami showed up as a trio. Seriously, what was that? Strawberry and licorice?”  
  


“Chocolate, I think. Still,” Pegasus waved his hand across a later portion of the chart, “it resulted in _ several _ instances where Adrien put together that Marinette was in love with him, in some cases coupled with coming to the conclusion that she was Ladybug…” Pegasus locked eyes with Bunnyx. “You _ really _ couldn’t stop her from sending that Valentine?”  
  


“Alya was determined.” Bunnyx sighs. “It was _ easier _ to set Marinette up with Luka… or at least to make it look like they were an item to Adrien, so that when she denied her feelings, he’d believe it.”  
  


“Still don’t believe he bought it after the Wax Museum Incident.” Pegasus observes.  
  


“Listen,” Bunnyx groans, “I am _ not _ proud of how much I had to undermine her self-confidence beforehand so that she’d backtrack even _ after _ she’d finally managed to confess, even _ if _ she thought she was practicing on a statue.”  
  


“And _ this…” _Pegasus points to a purple spot “...is where Gabriel decided to test his theory that Adrien was Chat Noir.”  
  


“Oh, man, that was _ hard. _ First time around,” Bunnyx begins ticking off her interventions on her fingers, “he transformed on the way down, _ like a sane person would. _ I figured the only way to stop him from doing so was to make sure Minibug was there because he’d trust her, so I arranged for the launch of the ad, the swim meet, and the cinema showing of Solitude to be the same day, _ and _ to get her to rush out of the house at just the right time to run into him, _ and _ for there to be horde of fans after him so she’d help him rather than going home to change out of her pyjamas, again, _ like a sane person would. _”  
  


“So that got Adrien to trust Ladybug and jump off without transforming, but… let’s just say I found out that this plan _ also _ required adding a few more stories to the architectural plans for the tower.” Bunnyx ticks off another finger as she speaks, before bringing her palm down on the back of her other hand with a slap. “Even then it took a fanboy with a cardboard cutout to _ actually _ persuade Hawkdaddy he’d got it wrong.”   
  
“Chat Blanc?” Pegasus points to the relevant spot, before giving Bunnyx an inquisitive glance. “I don’t remember a Chat Blanc?”  
  


Bunnyx gave a flat stare in return. “Ugh. Don’t ask. Let’s just say that it wasn’t entirely Marinette’s fault that she kept forgetting to sign things.”  
  


“Moving on… _ here’s _ the Music Video Incident.”  
  


“Took _ so _ many tries to make sure that Chloe shut that down _ before _ they put the masks on.” Bunnyx responds with an exasperated tone. “It’s why I had to arrange for Chloe and Marinette to become rivals in the first place, as many problems as _ that _ caused. First time around, Marinette was the first to commiserate when Audrey went to America, and the two were thick as thieves after that - she even gave Chloe a nickname. Allegro or something, I think it was? Cute as a pair of buttons, but awkward as _ heck _ keeping Adrien and Marinette apart when Chloe was determined that they were a perfect match and doing her level best to set them up, so I had to pry them apart.” Bunnyx falls silent, the two exchanging a look at the reminder of the importance of their mission and the sacrifices they had made to keep the timestream on a course that didn’t inexorably lead into disaster. “Uhhh… don’t tell either of them about that, either.”  
  


“Of course.” Pegasus assures her.  
  


“Anyway…” Bunnyx responds with an impatient tone, “...as _ fun _ as it can be to reminiscence, what was it that you found so important to tell me?”  
  


“Well, it’s this…” Pegasus waves over the chart again. “As much as we’ve been preventing each individual reveal, as time passes, more and more clues slip through which gives them more information about one another. We can’t realistically stop them learning _ anything _ about one another at all, but the more they know, the weaker the hint needs to be for them to make a breakthrough. As you can see, the result is that the time between potential reveals is getting shorter and shorter as time goes on.”  
  


“I had noticed.” Bunnyx responds, impatience still dripping from her words. “What’s your point?”  
  


“Based on this data, I had Markov extrapolate a projection on how many more interventions we’d need to keep them in the dark until they’re ready to take Hawkmoth on directly despite Adrien’s connection. And here’s the result…” Pegasus flourishes towards the screen, prompting the little artificial intelligence to display the projected chart.  
  


Bunnyx leans forward and points towards the end of the chart. “It looks like it stops… there.”  
  


“That’s not stopping” Pegasus corrects her. “That’s a _ singularity _.”  
  


“A what?”  
  


“The concept of a technological singularity comes from the observation that improvements of technology leads to the acceleration of the development of further improvements in technology, until a point is reached where technology is developing itself at a faster rate than humans can keep up with it.” Pegasus explains. “The analogous situation here is when our so-called oblivious idiots have put together enough of the pieces that it’s simply not possible to prevent them from figuring it out: shifting the timestream in a different direction to prevent one trigger will just push them into a _ different _ trigger. Unless we can either move the final fight with Hawkmoth forward without causing a disaster or find some other means of getting them to discount what they already know. So…” Pegasus turns towards Bunnyx with a helpless shrug. Have any more bright ideas?”  
  
_ If only those “idiots” were actually as blind as younger me had thought… _Bunnyx reflects as she starts to wrack her brains for some means of averting the disaster that her colleague and analyst had predicted.


	2. Unfixing Points in Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Put this together in response to a comment by [Aeshdan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aeshdan/pseuds/Aeshdan) on the original chapter. I figured I could respond in the comments, or I could let the characters themselves talk it out. :P
> 
> This should be considered as a prequel to the original chapter.
> 
> Enjoy! Or not, as you prefer.

“This is just  _ impossible! _ ” Bunnyx exclaims, flopping onto a convenient sofa. Interpreting Pegasus’ raised eyebrow as a question, she elaborates. “She’s best friends with his childhood playmate, Pegasus! As soon as he gets to school, they’re inseparable, and it’s only a matter of time until they realise they’re made for each other. Sometimes they’re in a relationship even before Chloe gets the Bee and they all figure each other out! And  _ then  _ Gabriel gets his chance to be an absolute jerkface and we get a Chat Blanc or an Antibug or something and it’s  _ all over. _ ”

“What if…” Pegasus pauses in an uncharacteristic hesitation. “What if we removed Chloe from the dynamic?”

“How would we do that? Bunnyx inquires.

“Well…” Pegasus ponders. “Chloe was always high-strung at the best of times, due to her mother’s frequent absences. If we were to make it so that Audrey spends even more time out of home… that in itself will make her 32.8% more volatile. In addition, there’s a 62.4% chance that Andre will respond to having to raise Chloe alone while dealing with the pressures of his work by spoiling her rotten. If we were to add to his responsibilities - such as by engineering things so that he wins the mayoral election - this probability would go up to 83.9%. If we were to set things up so that the first meeting between Chloe and Marinette goes badly, there’s a 74.3% chance that they’ll remain rivals at least until after the akuma attacks start.”

“Okay, so that gets them apart… but what if it pushes Adrien and Marinette too far apart?”

“That’s a concern, but I predict a 91.5% chance that Adrien would disapprove of Chloe’s behaviour in this scenario and attempt to distance himself from her after joining the class in this scenario, leading to a 68.6% chance that he’ll do something that causes Marinette to become enamoured with him within the first week even if we  _ don’t _ engineer such a circumstance ourselves. With her psychological profile, however, there’s a 56.4% chance that if she develops a crush on him before she’s already established the foundation of a friendship with him, she won’t get the courage to make a move before discovering that he’s Chat Noir or he makes the first move.”

“Hate to do this to them…” Bunnyx laments, “but if it’s what it takes to save the world, we need to try. What do we need to do to pull this off?”

* * *

“Well,  _ this _ has been an unmitigated disaster.”

“It seems that I had underestimated the effects of Chloe’s changed behaviour on Marinette’s psyche.”

“You  _ think?!” _ Bunnyx exclaims as she collapses into a chair. “The girl’s a nervous  _ wreck.  _ Between Chloe’s relentless bullying, nobody else wanting to get too close to her in case they become a target too, and the increased incidence of akumatisation within the class due to Chloe spreading her vitriol around anyway, she’s not making it past a  _ month _ before cracking under the pressure when the akumas start. In one timeline, she was so distracted by her own thoughts that she accidentally pushed the Guardian  _ into _ the oncoming traffic!”

“On the plus side, her increased social anxiety has reduced the chance of her making the first move in a romantic capacity to 13.4%.”

Bunnyx rolls her eyes. “Except that the only time she lasts as a hero long enough to matter is when Adrien comes in as her only real friend before she breaks, and that’s  _ exactly the situation we’re trying to avoid.” _

“Maybe that’s it,” Pegasus ponders, giving Bunnyx a meaningful look. “Maybe she needs a close friend…”

“Me?” Bunnyx gasps. “Ohnononono. Look, Littleme likes her well enough, but her mind’s basically part fashion and part  _ nerd _ … no offense. She just doesn’t have enough in common for Littleme to be as close a friend as she needs. That’s how we ended up with Guardian Pancake in the first place. And even if I micromanage Littleme enough so that they do stay close friends, Littlenette just tries to give Littleme the earrings.  _ Not. It. _ ”

“Then, if what she needs is a nerd, then…”

“Oh, come on.” Bunnyx give Pegasus a flat stare. “You and I both know Littleyou doesn’t have what it takes on an emotional level to keep Littlenette’s together.”

“...If you’d let me finish,” Pegasus huffs, raising a remote to the screen and cycling through a series of faces “I was actually going to suggest…”

“Cesaire?” Bunnyx fills in. “She’s usually closer to Adrien, isn’t she?”

“Yes,” Pegasus acknowledges, “but that was before we made the alterations to Chloe’s timeline. Now, she’s butting heads with Chloe pretty much every time they meet. If we arrange things so that she’s in the class that year, there’s a 91.2% chance they’ll end up in an alliance against Chloe.”

“And between their common interest in cooking and Alya’s internet obsession, they’ll probably bond pretty well from there. But wouldn’t putting her that close to Ladybug be a problem?” 

“That’s a problem for her, not for us.” Pegasus asserts in response. “According to my analysis, Marinette is 72.3% likely to respond to having someone close by trying to discover Ladybug’s identity by making herself  _ more _ cautious about her secret identity, resulting in a net reduction of her revealing her identity by 18.7%. Furthermore, with regards to our original mission parameters, I’ve run a projection on Alya’s wingwomanning style applied to Marinette’s personality, and I calculate a 62.5% chance of Alya being overly pushy and actually making Marinette  _ more _ nervous about confessing any crush she might have.”

“Sounds like you’ve found a good match there, horse-boy.” Bunnyx acknowledges. “Okay, show me the timestream simulations - what are we looking to change to get them in the same class in the right year?” 

**Author's Note:**

> Bringing in the "Chloe and Marinette were friends, and Bunnyx arranged to break them up" angle was a bit of a last minute idea, when I considered just how many opportunities Adrien and Marinette would have had to interact (and, therefore, how many more opportunities to figure each other out) if she was friends with Chloe. Hits on the "there is one least bad timeline, and sacrifices need to be made to achieve it" trope that often occurs in stories involving repeated time travel or prophecy.


End file.
